Monday, December 30, 2019
It’s These Moments...
Parenting...over break...I must admit it’s been the easiest this year. They are older and it’s easier but funny how I say I am tired and need a little break. But then this happens.
I go in my phone and see my youngest has taken a ton of selfies. She cracks me up.
Then my middle one falls asleep early on the couch. As I am carrying her to her room she sort of wakes up. I say it’s ok mommy is here. She says I love you. I reply I love you too. She then says over and over I love you more than anyone in the world Mommy. I really do. I say I know you do. Sleep well. I love you too.
My oldest says she loves me more and more. All the time. When I say I love you too more and more she says no way. I love you more.
And it’s true. They do. I know they do. They love me more than anyone in the world. Just like you did too as a kid. Just like your kids do to you.
And there’s moments when it’s tough and tiring. Then there’s moments that they melt your heart and love you more than anyone does. They love you even when you look like a hot mess. They love you because you make them feel safe and loved and taken care of. And all along you love people who do the same for you. Who make you feel loved and taken care of. It’s a cycle. We all want to be taken care or and cuddled and validated and loved. We all want people who make us feel safe and good. 💗
Life...It Changes
You have to break the cycle to get different results. You have to realize if you keep doing the same thing you get the same results. Be adventurous. Embrace life. Know people come and go. Know that every situation helps you grow.
Purge All That and Start Again
I woke up a little sad. Not sure why. Maybe from being overtired. I started to think about this past year. Past disagreements replayed in my head. I had to learn to let it go. Accept the outcomes and know that what’s meant for me will be. I always felt things would end differently this year and realization is sometimes things don’t play out the way we thought. It’s our job to feel. Accept. Start again.
I always believe in signs and numbers are huge for me. Looking at numbers and seeing correlations to them. Following my intuition. When your brain is clogged with fog it’s hard to think clearly. Today’s one of this days. I will need to spend extra time reflecting. Accepting. Working on person affirmations. Not everyday has to be sunshine. It’s ok to be down. But work through it and know that doesn’t last.
