Thursday, January 14, 2021

Enjoy The Present


Everything is temporary...even love. 

I was talking to my friend the other day who started dating again. He’s been great at helping me in the past. He’s a secure attachment style. I had my share of being anxious attachment style that I always envied his capability to date so securely. I remember when I first met him a year and half ago we hung out for 6 hours just talking. 

He really helps me look at situations differently. 

It’s funny how my other best guy friend is a secure dating type as well. He recently ended a relationship and I knew the minute he said she was anxious and avoidance type at the same time I knew they wouldn’t last. 

Why? Because everyone wants a relationship where two people are secure and don’t need eachother. They want to be with eachother. There’s no anxiety or tension or stress. It’s pure enjoyment. Intelligent conversation. As adults you can’t date with a 18 yr old mindset. You have to be mature and secure and so many people do not date that way. Married people
don’t even have adult relationships with eachother. So many date with that younger mind set that creates unnecessary arguments and drama and jealousy. 

You have to break the cycle. Everything is temporary you never know how long situations will last but the more secure you become and independent the better off you’ll be. 

So many girlfriends I have are avoidance dating types. Focused only on career and themselves. They don’t have time to date. It’s not true. I am divorced mom
Of 3. I work and homeschool all day. It’s not the idea situation but I still make time to date. So it’s not about time. It’s about avoiding something. It’s about saying I am going to stay in my happy bubble alone because I want to avoid issues dating triggers. 

I don’t recommend that either. I recommend becoming secure and happy within that you can have healthy discussions and relationships without being anxious or avoidance. 

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