Don't Let It Get the Best Of You

I have this amazing baby is my arms and all I keep thinking about is how could I have cancer in my body, how could this baby have been in my belly while I had cancer? It's crazy I know and as much as I try not to think about it I see my preop appointment on my calendar and My surgery date haunting me. I keep thinking this too will past but I have to admit its really taking a toll on me. I am slowly recovery from my csection and hate to have another surgery. I am trying not to let this get the best of me but the only way to deal is to feel!