When a friend was telling me a story I swear I had flashbacks. It was a situation where her friend was triggered and he acted out of control. She never saw him like it. It was disturbing.
I have had situations in my life like this. When you have no choice but to remain quiet and calm. Where someone flies off the handle. Blacks out mentally and loses their control. It’s awful. In that moment you have to remain calm. Once the person is done they may blame you for their episode or apology over and over saying they will never repeat that behavior again.
The behavior does repeat. It may not happen frequent. But when it does it’s awful again. Sometimes it’s once a year or twice or once a month. Regardless the enraged person is out of control. It’s scary to the other people witnessing it. It’s damaging. I won’t lie I have flashbacks of it. It angers me but I luckily removed myself from a situation like this but this person still does it. Just not to me but to family members or anyone who may triggers them.
We all have triggers. What we need to understand is how we react to them that’s what causes the problems.
When my friend told me the story I advised her to stay away. There’s nothing holding her on to this person. They aren’t married or have kids or live together. Leave before you witness this again. Because what happens is this. It’s within them. They go to therapy and anger management and adjust their meds but it’s within them. I know it’s wrong to say it but we all have flaws. We all have “demons” in us. This is their demon. The lack of control when triggered. It’s almost a control thing. They then become verbally abusive and try to empower you. It’s very degrading.
Women do this too. Not just men.
I had a friend who has dealt with this. It’s not often but it has happened three to four times in the year I knew this person. She loses her mind and it’s because she gets triggered. Later she apologies or promises to not act this way but I am sorry to say she will. It’s because it’s part of who they are.
They can be the best people when not triggered. Family orientated. Hard workers. Devoted. Sweet. Kind. Lovable. Romantic. But their inner demon causes them to snap when they are triggered.
If you know someone like this be sure to make sure they get help. Adjust medicine. Do understand this is not a reflection on you but on them. Do know they will snap again. When they snap you need to defuse the situation. Remain calm. Once they cool down you can address the situation.
