Sunday, October 6, 2019
It’s About Having Healthy, Good Boundaries...Always
❤️
What’s not right for you will never make you feel good. Let it go. Focus on the situations that are good for your mind, body and soul. All the rest can go away. All the other situations come to an end because they aren’t for your higher good. It took me a while to realize this but the more people I met and more good people I surrounded myself with I realized I should never ever surround myself with someone who doesn’t make me feel good. Who said and did things that I would never tolerate but somehow I did.
Set those situations free. Live by your true self. Smile. Glow. Be happy. Have healthy boundaries and good will come. Always.
Are You A Mom? Girls Night!
Have you ever been asked this? In a club or bar. It happens every time I go out with this one friend. The funny thing is she’s a teacher not a Mom. But it’s hysterical that we get asked. Last time it was college kids when we were out with mutual friends we dated. This time it was another group of moms who wanted to dance with us. I must admit it gave us a good laugh.
We had so much fun we went out to breakfast again before heading home.
Our whole day wasn’t planned. Want to grab breakfast sure. Then at breakfast we decided on dinner. Then at dinner we decided on what town to spend our night in. Nothing planned just go with it. Before you know it we are partying in White Plains with other “moms”.
It was awesome. Spontaneous fun. We met people. We laughed so much our makeup ran down the side of our face. We felt rejuvenated. Like we were 21 again.
We had so much fun we went out to breakfast again before heading home.
Life is not meant to be planned always. Yes save money. Don’t have debt. But spontaneous, hey you around let’s go do this, type of fun has been my life lately and I think it’s actually keeping me young!
Today’s this morning “are you around” texts was awesome and I love it. Life is suppose to be adventurous. The little moments make it worth while. We caught up and laughed some more.
I share my stories to help you understand something about life. Heartache and pain happens but then god brings people into your life to help you feel reborn again. Those people need you and you need them
Love them. Have fun. Cherish them. Enjoy the times you have together. We will be smiling all week from
The night together. Trust those who come into your life. They are medicine for your soul.
How You React To Your Triggers Matters...A lot
When a friend was telling me a story I swear I had flashbacks. It was a situation where her friend was triggered and he acted out of control. She never saw him like it. It was disturbing.
I have had situations in my life like this. When you have no choice but to remain quiet and calm. Where someone flies off the handle. Blacks out mentally and loses their control. It’s awful. In that moment you have to remain calm. Once the person is done they may blame you for their episode or apology over and over saying they will never repeat that behavior again.
The behavior does repeat. It may not happen frequent. But when it does it’s awful again. Sometimes it’s once a year or twice or once a month. Regardless the enraged person is out of control. It’s scary to the other people witnessing it. It’s damaging. I won’t lie I have flashbacks of it. It angers me but I luckily removed myself from a situation like this but this person still does it. Just not to me but to family members or anyone who may triggers them.
We all have triggers. What we need to understand is how we react to them that’s what causes the problems.
When my friend told me the story I advised her to stay away. There’s nothing holding her on to this person. They aren’t married or have kids or live together. Leave before you witness this again. Because what happens is this. It’s within them. They go to therapy and anger management and adjust their meds but it’s within them. I know it’s wrong to say it but we all have flaws. We all have “demons” in us. This is their demon. The lack of control when triggered. It’s almost a control thing. They then become verbally abusive and try to empower you. It’s very degrading.
Women do this too. Not just men.
I had a friend who has dealt with this. It’s not often but it has happened three to four times in the year I knew this person. She loses her mind and it’s because she gets triggered. Later she apologies or promises to not act this way but I am sorry to say she will. It’s because it’s part of who they are.
They can be the best people when not triggered. Family orientated. Hard workers. Devoted. Sweet. Kind. Lovable. Romantic. But their inner demon causes them to snap when they are triggered.
If you know someone like this be sure to make sure they get help. Adjust medicine. Do understand this is not a reflection on you but on them. Do know they will snap again. When they snap you need to defuse the situation. Remain calm. Once they cool down you can address the situation.
KEE Oyster House White Plains
This place is awesome. It’s beautiful and the menu is so upscale. We sat at the bar for drinks and looked at every dish that came out of the kitchen. The food smelled amazing. The staff was great and so fun. The bartenders were great to speak with and we want to go back for dinner. I love stumbling upon places. It was packed when we got there. Full house. Great ambiance. Great menu. If you’re in white plains be sure to check it out.
When Two Souls Meet At The Wrong Time
This can happen. What we don’t realize that it’s a lesson. On both parts. It’s to teach you something. You can’t look at it as a complete lose. It’s not. It helps you at that time in your life when you needed it to. Then you let go because your lesson is over. Accept. Release. Carry on ❤️
Swirl Crepes in White Plains
I have been wanting to go here. There’s a similar place in Fairfield. It’s a crepe. You fill it with yogurt or ice cream or food. One guy had it with french fries. We ordered it with Strawberries, Nutella and vanilla ice cream. Amazing.
Saturday, October 5, 2019
Anthropologie in Westport Living Beyond Breast Cancer
I LOVE when I see a company supporting a cause. It just makes my heart happy. Anthropologie has partnered with Living Beyond Breast Cancer, a non-profit that connects those whose lives have been affected by breast cancer with support, information, and community.
Terrain in Westport CT Perfect For Breakfast or Lunch
I have been wanting to come here. Every time something came up. It’s been a little while since I saw my friend and she’s like let’s meet here for breakfast/lunch. I was overly excited since I have had this place on my list. It’s amazing!
We sat outside and it was perfect. They had a fire pit going so you can smell the wood burning. We ordered spiked cider and a burger with onion jam. We laughed over our crazy lives. Even the staff was cracking up with us. They were great.
Another friend met up with us. We stayed for hours chatting and laughing. The ambiance is beautiful. Just gorgeous. They served us bread in a flower pot with chocolate latte butter. It was so much fun.
The garden center and shop is full with amazing beautiful and creative stuff. Your brain is on overload of the beauty around you. It’s gorgeous.
We didn’t need a reservation but by noon valet parking was packed so I do advise you get there early or make reservations ahead of time.
It’s my new favorite spot. I can’t wait to go when they decorate for Christmas and bring my kids too.
https://www.shopterrain.com/pages/westport-restaurant
https://www.shopterrain.com/pages/westport-restaurant
Fall Fun Finds at Trader Joe’s
I love Trader Joe’s. They always have awesome fun treats. I also love how they always have themes. How appropriate are these for Fall.
My favorite flower are the Gerber Daisy’s. I was so excited to find them at Trader Joe’s for $9.99. I was look at the flowers and smiling with excitement. I put this boutique in my carriage and a lady walks by and says “you picked a beautiful bouquet”. I said “thank you they are my favorite flower and I love how long Trader Joe’s flowers last verse regular stores.” She agreed and went on to tell me how they last two weeks verse 3-4 other places. Yep and for an amazing price.
I smiled for the rest of my shopping time. Because it’s the little things that cause happiness. Like finding a bouquet of your favorite flowers.
Loving Her Now Not Later
There’s been times when people risk that chance of letting someone go. Be sure before doing that. Because if someone doesn’t choose you now what makes you think you will want them later. Love yourself to know what you deserve. That later isn’t always ok. Now is the chance to make it right.
💗
The Perfect Friendship....The Mommy Crew
Our kids brought us together. We met 5 years ago and have been close ever since. Dinners. School events. Birthdays. Vacations. I love my “mommy crew”.
Whenever someone needs a night out we jump on the bandwagon. Two are missing of the group. It’s not always easy getting us all together.
It was perfect timing. My passport came in. We discussed our next journey together. Just “once moms” now just a group of gals who love each other’s company. Who love each other’s kid’s like their own. Who can have fun at play dates or road trips or moms night in or girls nights out.
Everyone needs a group of gals like this.
Friday, October 4, 2019
Clean Bill Of Health Thanks Doc
I love my doctor. He’s probably 10 years older than me. He’s funny and real. So I have my physical today and he asks if any concerns. Of course I bring up weight loss and tactics. He’s like listen to be honest you’re in perfect health. Your cholesterol changed drastically since April. Your sugar levels are perfect. Everything came back normal. You’re perfect. Now if you want to loose weight it’s not about the number. It’s about having a healthier lifestyle. Promise to not look at scale.
Well let’s not get carried away. I told my Mom she’s like see what happens when you’re happy. What changed in a year or 6 months? No drama. No stress. You’re happy.
So maybe it’s a lifestyle change. Maybe it’s a diet. Maybe it is being happy. Maybe it’s being calm. Regardless I am one happy and grateful gal.
Being happy is key. Life is so up and down. Remove any drama or stress. Just be happy.
Men Are Not Complicated They Are Just Like Women
We tend to forget this. Men aren’t complicated. Men are like women. We put energy into people we want in our life’s. Men do the same thing. We aren’t so different as people think. Pay attention. Don’t waste your time and energy on people who do not do the same for you.
You Have To Try To Bond Whenever Possible
She’s at this age. It’s so much fun. Even though I look at her like my baby girl. She’s almost 11. We are sort of buddies. Our dialogue can be really fun. We started watching shows together. So last night I am on the other side of the house and she texts me. Her dialogue is in grey.
She likes to push my buttons and I try to show my funny side to get her to laugh. You’re not cool mom she says. I always respond just ask my friends they think I am.
You have to bond with your kids. You have to have conversations. We were laying down watching a random show and she starts talking. About random things. I always ask so how did that make you feel. I never had that dialogue growing up. I was the kid. It’s normal to not have it but now a days it’s different.
Kids deal with so much more. Social media can suck. Body changes. Circumstances are so different. I have to stay on top of the situation whenever I can. So bonding has worked. It gives us alone time. She feels like my peer even though at times I check her on it. I am the mom. I tell her we aren’t friends, yet. I need her to take me serious even though I make an effort.
I am a mom of three. It’s not easy. It’s hard to be there for each of them all the time. But I try hard. I notice certain times of the day they open up. I try to make note of it. They all need different things but they also all need the same things. To be heard and noticed and loved. That’s all I can do.
You Need To Step It Up Girls
I am that Mom. You know the one that preps the night before. Who is oblivious and thinks by doing this we don’t rush in the morning. Ha! Jokes on me.
Every night I prep. I lay out their clothes for next day. I pack anything non perishable for the snack and lunch. I make sure jackets and hats are out and shoes. I even go to the extend of filling their water bottles up.
I am all about making things easy and then morning comes.
I make their breakfast, make their beds even wash their face- I go up to them with a warm wash cloth and wipe their face! Can you imagine. I feel dumb even writing this. All they have to do is brush their teeth, eat, get dressed and put their lunch boxes in their book bag. You would think this process would be easy and smooth. NOPE. It doesn’t change. It’s the same every day. No easy ways. Same old.
I have turned into that Mom. Come on honey eat your breakfast. I walk in the other room they are playing in their pajamas or on electronics or watching TV or literally dragging their butts and not doing anything. NOTHING.
Yep. Typical morning.
Now let’s be fair. There’s always that one who is like. Look mom I am dressed, brushed my teeth, ate, packed my food and am ready to go. The golden kid. The shining star. It’s not always the same kid. They actually take turns while the others are like turtles. Taking their time to do anything. Tell the others to stop bragging to mom. It’s pretty amusing.
So today I was like listen I can’t do more for you than I am doing. This is blowing my mind. I literally do it all. I just will not do more. I mean I can’t spoon feed all of your breakfast.
So they all apologize like always where I don’t even care. I am like save it. Just change.
We are walking outside. They are like complimenting me up and down. Mom you’re the best. Mom we promise we will not do this. Yada yada. I open the garage and they are drawing all over my car with their finger and I look up and see the sun shining down on the leaves. Like God hit me in the face and I freeze.
Girls. I say. Look at the trees. Look at the foliage. My mood immediately shifts. I am at peace. In awe of the beauty.
Now this story is to teach you something. Actually a couple of things. It’s to teach you that no matter how much you do your kid will totally try to tick you off and you gotta just flow with it. That life can be planned to a point and then just go with it cause preparing doesn’t mean you get the results you want and need. Lastly stop.
Stop what you’re doing and focus on the beauty of life. The chaos. The rushing. The craziness. Stop.
Embrace it. Let it enter your mind and body. Let it touch your soul. Let it calm you and bring you peace and happiness. Life isn’t easy. Life is crazy. We rush. We are competing against the clock. Stop.
Enjoy the view. Enjoy things passing you by. These little moments can make all the bad crazy moments disappear.
Embrace them!
Stop With Overthinking
Don’t assume. Assuming causes more damage than reading what is there.
I have always been honest. Real. I am upfront. I tell things from my prospective. How I view situations. I don’t hide behind words. I believe we all are free to do and be and think and act how we choose. But doesn’t mean we all have to agree.
Life isn’t meant to be understood by everyone. Your life has to be understood by you. But you do need to back up your words with actions. You do need to know if you are saying you’re going to do something you need to follow through.
Follow How You Feel...The Universe Doesn’t Lie
My mood started to change. I had to defend myself and I finally said. No you don’t. You need to not respond. Not react. Keep the peace yet detach.
You don’t understand. Your only power is YOU. Who you let in and who you don’t.
I had a couple situations happen yesterday with different people. One taught me this: some people like confrontation and I have no room for it. The second taught me: people need to be responsible for the information they process. Look at the facts not between the lines.
As much as I try I realize my energy flow doesn’t need certain situations in my life. A girlfriend reached out. She’s like I know your patterns. You learned now let it go.
We fight so hard for a happy good life. Don’t waste your time and energy on energy that conflicts with yours.
Put things to rest and don’t feed more energy into it.
Protect Your Energy
It’s ok because it’s what you need. Stop focusing on what others need. Put yourself first. 💜
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