I have a friend who is recently divorced. Really sweet awesome girl. We hang out a lot and her dating game has been a roller coaster ride, like most of us. Maybe it’s me she said. Um no.
I had to call her and break it down. Listen we all have baggage and issues to deal with and resolve within ourselves BUT you’re not the problem. Who you are picking to date is the problem.
None of the guys are future material and that’s ok. So let’s break it down I said. Let’s put them in categories. Friends. Fun. Future.
Now think of all the guys you dated or want to date. What category do they fall in? What category did they put YOU in?
Now all these categories matter. They really do but we kind of confuse where people belong and well that's where we get hurt and mad and upset. That’s where we settle and burn. That’s where we hurt ourselves. We want everyone to fall in the future category but it doesn’t always work out that way. We also don’t match what category they put us in. Know your audience. I too have a lot to learn.
Try it...
It even applies to friendships really. Who is fun, night in, coffee days, vacation buddies. Not all friends can be in all categories.
Everyone you meet in life teaches you something. Even if it a quick lesson. The goal is to know yourself enough to know what you need and how to not just settle. It’s also to say I am happy alone instead of settling in life or looking for someone to complete us. You are complete. That’s not the issue. The issue is finding that person who puts us in the same category as we put them in. Someone to grow with and have a future with.
No time is ever wasted. Everyone role helped us at a point in our life when we needed them too. Yes heartache comes attached to it but let it go. Let go of the idea of something that isn’t there. I put dating on hold to just focus on the present. Because that’s what I need right now. You need to do what you need right now too.
