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Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Let Go Of Your Anger

I turned 30 a point in your life where you should be happy in your skin and content with life. I wasn't. I went through a rough couple years in my early 30's. I only had my oldest daughter and trouble getting pregnant, my husband and I fought a lot, I hated working from home and always wanted to be out, I partied more then I should have, I smoked, I ran a lot- it helped release stress. It should have been the best years of what was yet to be and it wasn't. Thankfully it got better but I had a lot of anger in me. Not so much anger as in rage but anger in trying to figure out what I wanted in life and where I was going and who I was and what made me happy. I was sick of doctors and being poked at for trying to get pregnant, my husband wasn't happy where he was in his career, he was angry too and crabby which would make me crabby.

I needed some soul searching! 

The first step in making your life better is owning and admitting the fact you need to make it better. I wanted my relationship with my husband to be better, I wanted to be that care free soul again, I wanted more children and I was happy with working from home as long as I knew I was having more children to care for. I didn't want to party anymore or be unhappy or fight or not know what I wanted. 

I let go of all of that, woke up and said I want another Baby and a good happy marriage and worked on it and it happened. 

It was not easy but it was better. My house and marriage was my bubble. It was my escape from the outside "noise" and drama and when that bubble gets interrupted or effected and was no longer my escape it was hard to find comfort and happiness. 

Find your happy place. When we are unhappy it means we are lacking something in our life. Figure it out and then work towards making things better. Let go of any anger and what ifs and unhappiness. Own up to what is making you angry or unhappy. 

Those years took years off my life. It was awful to have felt that way. Now the peace I have has given me a new life and outlook on things and who knew two more babies later, and dealing with thyroid cancer I would be back to feeling good about life like I did in my 20's. 



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