Welcome Back...J

(Old fashioned at 348 Oyster Bar with my Mom)

This morning my mom said Hey J, welcome back. 

I didn’t understand what she was talking about. 

What do you mean mom?

You haven’t been yourself for a little while and now I notice you are back to you and I wanted to let you know. I like that. 

When did you notice a change back I asked her. 

A week or two ago she said. 

I don’t know what triggered a change but I do feel more at ease. More at peace. A lot of factors play in me bringing myself back to my core. My roots.  

My true self. 

I think it’s important we connect within with our true self. I think we get caught up in stress and noise. I have decluttered my life and surroundings. Some

home projects have been completed. My vacation helped me relax. I have connected with my true self and anything that doesn’t apply to it I dismiss. I have handled some matters professionally that have been a pain. 

Life is never going to be perfect. It’s a rollercoaster ride. But when you lose your true self along the way it becomes a problem. My core is peace and calmness. Routine. Structure. When it isnt aligned or in chaos I don’t function how I should. 

Be sure to always be in balance with who YOU are. To what YOU need in your life to bring yourself peace and calmness. 

Cheers to your happiness and finding YOU!

Stop Chasing Butterflies...I mean Love

I took them outside. We swam. After a couple of hours they went to play on the playground. My niece kept saying to the sky please come down. Please let me know hold you. 

There was a beautiful butterfly. I love butterflies. They remind me of my battle with thyroid cancer. The thyroid is in a shape of a butterfly. But this time my heart hurt. All of a sudden. She was running all over the yard chasing this beautiful butterfly. She was begging for it to come down to her. She kept asking “why won’t you just let me catch you” It was like chasing love. 

They say if you chase something you will push it away but if you let it be. Sit still. It will come to you. Like a butterfly. Like love. Not forced. Naturally drawn to you. 

Life has to be played this way. To be patient and calm. To not rush results. To not assume being aggressive always works in your favor. To understand that the happiest people are at peace within. That whatever is meant to be part of their life will come to them. 

 

You Will Heal...You Will Move Past This

In every situation pain doesn’t stick around forever. Everyday will get easier and easier. Everything heals. Even the heart. 

Feel Good Song: Cleopatra

That’s All She Wanted...

It’s ok to let your guard down. Even when you have been hurt. It’s ok to risk it...after all doesn’t everyone just want to end up happy and in love. 

Feel Good Song: You Got It

Don’t Fear Change...It Can Be Beautiful!

Food & Love....

Or first ❤️

Soho Bar 1 Year Anniversary August 10th

http://www.sohobarnorwalk.com/

Awaken Your Soul

All wounds build character. No one goes through this journey without some pain. Don’t let it defeat you. Let it build you up. 

Feel Good Song: I Found

Happy Friday!

Been a long week. Hope you all enjoy your weekend as much as I plan to!

Feel Good Song: Only Human

Did You Know Cashews

It’s The Turning Point In Your Life...

Last Day Of Camp....This Uber Mom Gets To Take A Break

6 times a day. Can you imagine? These last 6 weeks of camp I felt like a Uber driver. Three different drop off times for camp and three different pick up times. 

By 4:00 pm I was exhausted. I would run around town. Work and run around town again. Finally today I said holy crap. This schedule was insane. Their Dad only dropped off one once a week and picked up one once a week so imagine. I drove around town 28 times a week. So whenever anyone questions a parent’s or mother’s role I just laugh. Don’t be an idiot and ever do that. It’s not ok nor fair. 

Our roles are like no other. It’s a lot of work. I lay in bed writing after taking advantage of every minute in my day by doing something. Up by 6:00 in bed before midnight. Work out pack lunches and snacks for their day. Breakfast. Drop offs are 8:00-9:15 and working by 9:30. Back to all

School pickups. Snacks. Dinner. Cuddles and prepping for the next day again. Laying in bed with all three individually at night. Recapping the day. Bedtime kisses. 

It’s been no joke. It almost easier just having them home besides making it extremely difficult to work. Take calls or concentrate. 

I am not writing this to say all I do because you moms do it all too. I am writing this because it’s not easy. And anyone who doesn’t appreciate you for it well they can go for a walk. 

Until you’ve walked in their, mine, moms, a parents, shoes well then you don’t judge. Don’t under appreciate a mom’s role. Don’t ever under appreciate all it takes to raise three kids or any kid for that matter. 

SoNo Sky Bar & Cafe Opening This Weekend

Love the rooftop bars opening up around town. This one is located at 45 South Main Street in Sono. 

They will be offering half price wine, beers and cocktails from 5:30-8:30 pm

Can’t wait to check this out. 

*Picture source Instagram 

Maybe We Don’t Always Want To Be Strong

I was talking to someone close to me who is having a series of not the best luck with her health. Another testing another result. Another plan to what to do next. 

She’s in good spirits and said “We are some tough ass cookies 💪🏼 no sissy’s here. Haha” and I responded it sucks we always have to be. 

Sometimes we don’t want to be. Sometimes we want to have someone comfort us and take care of us and say it’s not fair or ok, I am here for you, or for life to just be easy and normal. 

Yes, be grafteful for the love and support but sometimes it takes more energy to always be strong and positive then to say you know what this time I am not ok. This time I want to just live a carefree life and not worry about tomorrow anymore.

 I admire her strengthen but also feel that sometimes just sometimes living in a fantasy life helps verse the reality. Sometimes being strong always takes away a chance for someone to comfort us. Maybe showing our soft side doesn’t make us weak. Makes us human. 

Feel Good Song: This Is What Makes Us Girls

We put love first. We want someone to put us first too. We want someone to soften us up even when we act too strong. It’s finding the right person to let our guard down with. 

Make Your Own Rules

❤️

Seafood & Brewfest August 10th

Learn more here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/seafood-and-brew-fest-tickets-62318433111

It’s Ok To Not Be Ok!

It’s ok to have days when you’re not ok. When you’re upset or sad or something bothers you. What’s NOT ok is not allowing to feel. To pretend to be ok. I have let my guard down a lot in the past and even the last year and a half. And it has backfired but taught me a hell of a lot about me and life and love and lessons. 

Pain is worse than anger. I rather be angry then have pain in my heart. Complete sadness is heartbreaking. It’s a process we all go through at one point in life and it’s not fun. 

Good Morning Visitors...

I try not to workout outside after it rains. It’s not as pretty. But this morning I wanted some fresh air. I heard crackling in the woods. I went up and down the driveway and then felt something  looking at me. From a distance I saw baby deer hiding. I shouted it’s ok you can come out. I saw it wagging it’s tail so it was signally to the other one to come out too. It didn’t it stayed in the woods. But this one stayed near me. 

It then just hung out while I worked out. I know sounds so silly but it was so peaceful. At the same time my favorite song from my honeymoon in Hawaii with my ex husband came on. I have healed from my marriage ending so things don’t bother me anymore related to it. I actually still like the songs and wedding songs. I have no regrets. All lessons learned. I felt it was appropriate timing to be on. Me outside working out. Deer hanging out. Yeah I know kind of a fantasy or not a big deal to others. But brought me a lot of peace and happiness so a big deal to me. 

Men Are Just As Confused As Women

I love this guy and his real talk. Dating in 2019 is so different than twenty years ago. A lot of options. A lot of what ifs. This may help some of you going through the struggle. 

No more games. Just everyone is trying to figure it all out. 

Everyday Do Something That Makes You Happy!

Happy Thursday: You Are Enough

Repeat after me...

You are strong

You are beautiful 

You are enough

Who doesn’t see that in you or make you feel that way well you know what I would say to them...you don’t have to but don’t stand in my way of those who can and do and will. 

Nando Fragolino ...Strawberry Champagne

A girlfriend brought bottles of these to Cape Cod and lucky me she gave me whatever was left unopened. 

It’s sweet like Prosecco and bubbly. Perfectly served chilled with strawberries. Perfect summer chill beverage. 

“A delicious sparkling wine, with the fruity refreshing taste of berry flavors.”*

*https://winelibrary.com/wines/isabella/nando-fragolino-11966

Sounds Of Liberty Square August 8th

Learn more here: https://www.google.com/amp/s/patch.com/connecticut/norwalk/amp/cal/20190808/607876/sounds-of-liberty-square

Connecting With Them Over & Over Again

It’s not easy having a pre-teen. It’s hard to connect and relate at times. She’s my oldest but every time I look at her I see the 4 yr old that once was my best buddy. So she got her phone taken away and she said well what do I do with myself. 

She kind of had a point. We swam a couple of times and she didn’t want to read. We already ate and cleaned up. We did crafts earlier. So I suggest. Dance off. 

What? Yep let’s do a dance off. 

She got to pick the song and moves and well for over an hour we made up dance routines to her favorite songs. It actually was a lot of fun, even my little ones joined in and said wow mom you can dance. Yep. But really it’s not easy with electronics and mood swings and everyone having their own responsibilities in life to tend to. 

It’s about always trying to find a way to connect to them. Kids change. We change. We as parents have to get out of our comfort zones and connect with them. Over and over again. 

Feel Good Song: Best Of You

August 7th Stay The Course

You Need To Feel

I learned it’s ok to not always be strong. It’s ok to say it hurts my heart and soul. It’s ok to feel. You need to feel too!

Circle of Life

It’s the circle of life right? When it comes to a lot of things. Someone lost something while someone else gained it. One person loves while the other one hurts. It’s not karma. That’s different. This is something deeper. 

Let me explain. 

My family is in the car industry. Accidents mean business. Painful right. It’s not always. Sometimes it’s minor sometimes it’s major. It’s like everything in life. Someone lost a job and now someone is excited to fill that position.  

Some marriages or relationships ends and the other person gains freedom or to have a relationship with someone else. Pain for one. Happiness for another. 

It’s a cycle. A hard one to accept. Trust me. 

One person misses someone while the other person is out enjoying life and having fun. No it’s not fair but it is how it is. 

It’s in every decision we make at any given time. There are moments I think how will I get through some situations and it’s distractions. You have to distract yourself and then deal and heal but don’t react. 

You can’t react every time you miss someone or are hurt and afraid. You can discuss it but you can’t make impulsive decisions because then you have to deal with regret. No one wants regrets but people do need to realize that what you do to people has an impact on them. You can’t love someone and be ok hurting them. You can’t miss someone yet never try to be in their life. You can’t be sad and go around acting like you’re ok. 

How you handle it is up to you!

Turn It Around...Wait What?

I write about starting day right. Well the other morning I wake up with all good intentions. Then it happens...

I lost my nose ring. Not a big deal but annoying. I do have backups but still. 

I go outside to workout and painters came early so I had to let them in and go get more supplies. 

My girls came home early morning  and my oldest trips on way to my car and skins her knee. Back inside we go and late to camp.

My middle one needed a shirt for camp. I grabbed wrong one luckily her sisters tell me so I run back inside tear apart the drawers and my mom says oh that shirt and hands it to me. 

I try to be pleasant through this all. I really do, not easy but I do and maybe have said under my breathe WTF a couple of times. 

Then my Mom says well the worst has happened so now your day will be awesome. I said wait what? She replies yeah when you let day starts off wrong it usually ends right. I smiled and said ok now I feel better. 

I swear rest of my day was awesome!

Never doubt what can happen when you change your mindset. Bad moments don’t have to be bad days. Bad situations don’t have the last. It’s ok to turn it around mid day. Mid hour. 

Women Learn From One Another

You have to be role models. To help eachother know what they are capable of. Look out for one another and look up to one another. 

August 6th...Be Your Best Self

RIP Toni Morrison

Don’t Repeat Past Mistakes...

Everything is a learning process. Who knew love had to be. I thought when you loved someone it would

be enough. Yeah you can laugh now. I know so oblivious. 

I do know that every relationship I had I learned something, some I am still looking for the meaning.  

Feel Good Song: Rose of Sharon

It’s ok to risk love. It may hurt but it’s so magical 💗

It Just Takes Time & That’s Ok

Romanacci in Norwalk

What’s better than half price bottle of wine, pizza, burratta, crepes and good company? 

Nothing!

I love these girls. We always have a blast when we are together. I must admit the truffle mushroom pizza and strawberry Nutella Crepe was delicious. Night out with the girls for $25 each. 

Yep...I know. Crazy!

http://romanacci.com/

I Don’t Feel The Same Way As You Do About It & That’s Ok!

We were early for camp so I took a detour and stopped by a dock with boats. We pulled up and I was alone with my oldest. She asked what we were doing and I said let’s go for a little walk near the water before camp. She refused at first. I began to take the walk alone. 

I wasn’t mad. I love being by the water. She caught up and said I don’t want to be here.

All I could think was I know these pre teen years will be hard but I am determined to make the best of it. 

I asked her to look around, all I see are boats mom, I asked her to breathe in the air, it stinks mom, I asked her to feel the air, she said she’s going back to the car. I began to laugh. 

She finally said I don’t see and feel what you do mom. This isn’t my happy place. 

Ok fine I said. I get it but you don’t have to ruin the experience for me. This is my happy place and I was trying to do something out of routine. 

She apologized. After I asked her to suggest her happy place so we could go the next time. 

Can you believe she actually held my hand in the car the whole ride to camp after this. 

I rubbed her hand and smiled. 

I don’t want her to have the same happy places as me. I actually liked she communicated it with me verse just standing there annoyed. I told her we don’t have to like the same things and she agreed. 

I think that’s the problem in life. With marriages and relationships and having kids. We want everyone to do and like what we do and like. Well it’s not that way. 

You have to be ok with that. Doesn’t mean you have to stop doing those things. Just means know your audience. Now I know if we have extra time I won’t take her to a dock or beach. 

Now she knows when she doesn’t like something she can communicate it with me and it won’t be a fight. 

It’s about creates a safe place to be open about how you feel and what you need and like etc...I have a lot to learn still in life in general but I began to realize when I process and truly listen verse reacting you get better results.

Cucumber Water: Oh Yum!

When we were away in Pennsylvania the hotel had a huge container of cucumber water. My 6 yr old couldn’t get enough of it. 

So I notice a ton of cucumbers in the fridge that have been picked from the garden and decided to surprise her. I called her into the kitchen and told her to look in the fridge. She noticed the jug of cucumber water and says “Oh Yum Mom” then she asks “What are cucumbers good for?”

Well let’s look it up. So I found this article. 

https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/7-health-benefits-of-cucumber#section2

The best part about flavoring water with veggies and fruits is that you’re not realizing your added benefits to your body while providing a healthy treat. Sometimes water isn’t enough. This helps add flavoring without the guilt. 

Feeling Down...Try Doing One Of These

You Don’t Have To Be Aggressive To Be Heard

Never underestimate the power of someone based on how they react or how vocal they are. 

Sometimes the calmest people are the stronger ones and loud aggressive people are weak. They tend to put up a tough image to protect themselves. They degrade people so they can be heard and have power over you. They are actually extremely insecure in themselves. The ones who remain silent processes everything around them at all times. They don’t tend to fly off the handle. They tend to choose their arguments based on the importance of them. 

Wake Up, Accept What Is & Shine

Certain things in life you just can’t be mad at. You have to say today will be a good day no matter what else lingers behind in your heart and mind has to be still. 

So do it. 

Wake up, Accept what is & Shine!

I believe in you and that whatever you go through in life is for the ultimate good. What may hurt now will make sense later. Trust it. 

Enjoy The Present

Forgive, Heal & Let Go

Forgiving doesn’t mean what they did was ok. It doesn’t mean it won’t hurt. It doesn’t mean you accept what they did. Forgiving means they no longer have power over you.  

Let go to grow. Move past the pain and hurt to be a better, stronger person. 

Don’t let them have control. You have control over yourself. No one else does. No one else ever should. 

Did You Know...Copper Cups

You’ve Come A Long Way

Did You Know Male Vs Female Brain

Bigger doesn’t always mean better. 

Apologizing & Appreciating

Feel Good Song: Never Give Up

August 5th Live Up To Your Full Potential

Monday Motivation: If It’s Meant To Be