Thank You For Being In My Life

When was the last time you thanked someone for being in your life. I do it all the time. I even thank you readers for being in my life. For making me feel sharing my stories may help you or heal you or make you smile to feel my love. 

Because that’s what we are suppose to do. Love eachother. Thank those who help build you up.  

We always ask what we are grateful for when we get together.  Tonight we agreed we all had a great day. I said how lucky are we to mostly have great days. How lucky to not have so many bad days and to embrace the good ones. They all agreed. It’s true. 

Tell someone how thankful you are for them. I love hearing it. I always tell people I appreciate them. Because they help heal me. They help me show my true side and live my best life. Life is not perfect but deep down happiness makes it great. 

Are you? Can you say you’re living your best life too? Can you thank someone for loving you and healing you too?

Please do it. Not for me but for your own soul and peace of mind. ❤️

Happiness...Be Happy With Your Pace

Change Your Perspective

This is important. We don’t change. We are the same people. How we handle situations change. You can look at me and see the same person a year ago. Well she’s not the same interms of what she thought was love or what she wanted and needed a year ago is completely different than what she needs today. 

Same is for you. 

As I wrote this I had a flash back and a pain in me. It’s ok to know things change. Just you know they can’t go back to the way it was. 

Look at life for what it is. Reality. Real. I love living in a fairy land. Fantasy that all is good. Unfortunately it got tarnished along the way. 

I am trying to bring myself back. To believe in things. But first I need to face realities of life. It’s actually been good for me. 

Change your perspective. It enables you to be sympathetic. Have empathy. Understand why people do what they do. Understand why people treated you like they did. 

Our job in life isn’t to hurt eachother. It’s to bring out the best in us. To share love and guidance. You need to not be naive. I was. I was for a long time. Not anymore. Now it’s about healing and growing and being the best version. You need to be your best version too. 

Be Good To People

💜

We All Have Insecurities & Scars....All Of Us

I was with a friend the other night he brought up something. I was hesitant responding.  I finally said because  I felt insecure and self conscious he looked at me and said I do too at times. I get it. I swear at that moment I connected with him on a totally different level. After I left he said to make sure I let him know I got home safely. I will be sleeping if I don’t respond but at least I can know you’re safe. 

We have been friends a couple of years. I swear my connection with him changed from that one moment. That one response. Just took one remark. I saw him differently and he saw me differently. He’s been really attentive since. Our friendship changed and I must say it changed to the better. It’s almost as if I accepted my flaws and he accepted his. It’s like we are being real with eachother. 

We all have scars and insecurities. I don’t care how amazing you look. How much money you have. How beautiful and handsome you are. What your body is like. How nice and funny you are. How upfront and secure you at. How out going you are. Your career status. 

We all have scars and doubts deep down. 

I was working out at the gym and a song came on and I looked around the gym and I swear I felt everyone’s insecurities. Everyone’s there to improve themselves. To help them feel and look better. 

You have to understand we all have doubts. The goal is to overcome them. The goal is to work on them. 

I used to have a friend  who would help me with self doubt issues. He helped me with workout tips. We both helped eachother with stuff in life. He was really attractive and great shape especially for his age and yet he has insecurities too deep down. I can go through a list of people in my life that have insecurities and doubts and I never see those things when I look at them. I see their amazing souls and great personalities or great bodies and beautiful faces. I see self confidence. 

But deep down they have these doubts. It’s our job to fix them. To forget the pictures of how we should be and look like and accept ourselves. To always improve but be comfortable in our skin with who we are. We are more than just a face and body. We have a deep down core. A soul. It’s not about looks. It’s about who you really are. How you make people feel. How you love and are kind and sweet and sincere. That’s beautiful. Not all this other stuff. 

You Have Control Over Yourself

I wanted to change so I am working to do so. You aren’t stuck. You too can change who you are in every situation at any time. 

The Feeling Of Being Ignored

This is a subject I wanted to touch base on because it triggers me when I am ignored. 

When you look within to fix yourself you try to analyze your triggers. 

I messaged a friend the other day to check on him. He’s in the military and with the world events I thought of him. Two days later he messaged back. I didn’t get upset. I figured he was busy. He was. He just got back from a mission and had a weekend before heading out again. I wasn’t mad. He apologized and was attentive until he left again. Weird thing is he had a procedure done and while I was nervous about his line to work he was already recovering from a procedure he had. Nothing major but still strange my intuition picked up on it. 

As for going a couple days not hearing from him in past I would be Concerned.  Worried about him. I do worry. I do care. He’s fighting for our country and saving lives. Why wouldn’t I worry. But it didn’t bother me he didn’t jump to respond this time.  I get it. We get busy. Am I a priority to him? Nah. Is he to me. Probably not either. But I thought of him and wanted him to know. 

What I realized was every time I felt ignored or not responded in the past I didn’t feel important to the person. Silly I get it. But I now know not to let it bother me. That it’s ok. If someone ignores you don’t worry about it. Most of the time, we know why. When we don’t, give it time. 

The whole point is to not react. To remain calm in every situation. To not be insecure. To know yes words unsaid do say a lot. But don’t lose sleep over it.  Those who care about you make an effort to show it. You can’t make someone care. 

Calm Your Brain Connect Within

I always had a thing for numbers and patterns. Not sure why. I don’t particularly like math. I am decent in it. I used to do accounts receivables for years but I still don’t understand my connection to it. But when I see a pattern I look it up. Today was 222. 

I know sounds silly. We all have our little quirks in life. This is mine. So I had to look it up. 

Here’s what I learned. 

What patterns do you follow. What numbers stand out for you?

Read More 

Here

Learn How To Play The Game

Dimes. Triple numbers. My right hand was itching I said to my girlfriend money is coming in. Next day I messaged her I received notification to get money back on something. 

I started to laugh. 

Our thoughts attract. The universe brings what we focus on. 

I knew a situation with a friend was not going the way I hoped. I couldn’t handle it so I pushed it away. I knew the outcome even though I didn’t want to accept it. But my mind body and soul knew. 

Listen to your intuition. Learn how to play the real game of “life”. 

Another friend I thanked for being their for me in 2019. I kept thinking of him for some reason and everytime he reached out after I thought of him. 

Your mind is powerful. Your actions are powerful. Your intuition is super powerful. 

💗

You don’t realize how powerful you are. Embrace it and use it towards your good. 

Feel Good Song: Nice To Meet Ya

Does Your Love Language Align?

I wrote about this last year here it’s important to know what makes you happy and your companion. Understanding who you are and what you need and want makes you a better person in a relationship. 

Live In The Present

Be Mindful What You Absorb

It’s A New Year With New Goals

It’s ok. That person is gone now. You aren’t who you were. You accept. Forgive. Release. Whatever it takes to know past mistakes don’t mean you are your mistakes. It means it all happened to teach you lessons. Great lessons about life and love and what you want and don’t want. 

Be Your Biggest Fan

Today’s Affirmation: Forgive Yourself

We are always thinking of forgiving others what about this time we forgive ourselves. For maybe not treating ourselves the way we should or letting others get the best of us. For not having confidence we should. For maybe body shaming ourselves or settling when we shouldn’t have. 

When you are at peace with yourself you can be at peace with others. 

Learn more affirmations here 

Happy Monday Follow Your Own Rules

❤️

Think Happy Be Happy

Focus on happiness. How about every night you take some time and reflect on what makes you happy or a happy thought of the day. Recall all the things that took place on your day that made you happy and smile. 

I will go first. I had a great day with my kids and family. I laughed with girlfriends. I worked out and ran some errands this morning. I did everything on my to do weekend list.  I loved sharing my fun spontaneous weekend with my sisters. A friend reached out and I always enjoy his company so he made me smile which who doesn’t love a great smile or someone who makes them feel special. 

So yeah today was a really good day with a lot of “little” nothings that are actually really big “somethings” because they contributed to my happiness. 

Now your turn....

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Break the Pattern

Thank those who helped you break your patterns. 

Be Proud Of Yourself

Are You Blocking Your Own Self?

Maybe we are causing our own heartache because we don’t want to be heartbroken anymore. 

Maybe we are picking people we know can’t fully give themselves to us so to cope we deal with situations that are emotionally safe- those not emotionally available. 

You have to break the cycle. It’s ok to get hurt and open your heart. You will learn. It’s not ok to stay in the same cycle. 

Jan 12th Love & Take Care of Yourself

Listen and Process

The Process Takes Time and That’s Ok

Do You Have Space For This In Your Life?

We all make decisions everyday as to who and what is in our life. You also need to determine what you have space for. Let’s be serious when it comes to this. 

As parents our schedule is full with our kids activities. When we are not with them we are working or doing house chores. We then make space for us- me time. Which is the gym or getting our nails done which I must say I didn’t do for years. But after the divorce I do make time for and the gym I make 4-5 x a week a priority.  

So what’s left after sleep and eat? Who do you fill that time with? What do you do with that time?

This is important because who we choose to fill our time with should be good for our wellbeing. Feel good people. Inspiring and motivation. Laughs. Happiness. 

You have to understand anything that doesn’t add to your life or make your life better you do not have space for. You do not make space for it. 

Think about it. Process this. 

Drama. Fighting. Anger. Doubt. Insecurities. All that stuff you have no space for. 

Make time for those people and situations that you walk away feeling good about sharing your space and time with. 

Those who you don’t then don’t waste your time. 

It’s important. It’s important who you make a priority. It’s important who you choose to speak to. Text. Hang with. See. Allow in your space. 

I wasn’t being careful with mine. I gave my space to situations that didn’t give me back in return. I don’t have space for doubt or pain or second guessing or hoping for change or thinking things will go my way. 

You don’t do this. You have to focus on being cautious of your time and space. Be sure those who you’re giving it to is giving it back to you. 

The Law Of The Universe

Connecticut Weather...

Support Others...Always

I carry you all with me on my journey. No two journeys are alike. What you need and what I need are different but we are here to guide one another. To love and respect eachother. Always. 

Pay Attention

Self Love Reflection

It’s self love. So important. When you very worthy and love yourself you won’t tolerate anyone else to make you feel less than that. You won’t even make room for toxic love or dysfunctional friendships and relationships. 

Are We Aligned?

Think of all past relationship and lost connections and friendships that got stale in time. Why? Why did that happen?

Alignment. 

When two people don’t have the same intentions arguments happen or you make space or you go your own way. 

Intentions have to be discussed and aligned and then met. I can say it over and over my stories. My side. My views. My pain. But it won’t change what happened. It won’t change the fact that certain people aren’t in my life because we weren’t aligned. It caused arguments and pain or just resulting in us going our own way. Lost contact and pain in our hearts. 

Intentions have to be met. You have to have good communication and know what people are is what you will get. 

I had a friend who always would say but I told you the truth. Yeah you did but in time emotions change. You enjoy a person or they become a part of routine. After a year of so it was a wake up call to me. I couldn’t go down the same paths in the past. I needed a change. I knew cutting ties would hurt but no way were we ever aligned.  Best thing to happen was me realizing this. I could have went another year or two and all it did was set me back emotionally. 

You must be aligned. You must also accept your truths. You must never toy with someone’s emotions. You must respect yourself and the people in your life. 

Detox Your Home

Are They Projecting?

A lot of times it has nothing to do with you. It’s their own inner issues and taking it out on you. Know the difference. 

Set Boundaries

New Habits Different Life

Acceptance is the process of knowing that what is done is done. You accept it. You learned from it. 

Growth is challenging yourself to be better to achieve more. To become a better version of yourself. 

Spiritual healing is being in-tune with your deep core. Your soul purpose. Being calm. Really calm and happy with yourself so you can love others fully. 

No one has reached perfection. It cannot exist amongst us. 

What we can do is change our habits that didn’t do us justice. We can look for peace and calmness and reflect. We can say this didn’t work for me I will try something else. No amount of blame can fix you. You own it. Even if you didn’t cause the pain or misfortune or heartache. You still own and accept it and do things to change. To make yourself better.  

Minor changes first. Baby steps. Achieve great results in a short period of time. 

Today’s Affirmation: Your Life Is in Balance

Louise Hay is amazing. Her book  You Can Heal Your Life, is full of life and wisdom and teaches you about affirmations and guidance and self love. I love that they have these daily affirmations that I will be sharing we all can interrupt them the way we like. I chose to look at this as if my life is in balance. How my current life is it’s working for me. I hope you too create a life with balance and wake up and say I love my life. 

Doesn’t mean it’s perfect. It means you have accepted your current state and will embrace and honor it. 

Feel Good Song: Dancing Nancies

💗

“I am who I am”

Happy Sunday

Does Your Love Language Align?

I wrote about this last year here it’s important to know what makes you happy and your companion. Understanding who you are and what you need and want makes you a better person in a relationship. 

Growing Up In The 90’s Bedtime Humor

Let The Past Be The Past

Forgive & Start Again

At any point in your life you can forgive and start again. You actually should forgive. You should never hold hurt or anger in your heart for anyone. Try to understand why everything happened the way it did. Once you can healing becomes easier. 

Jan 11th You Got This Girl

For so long we take care of other people. Of course our kids come first but I am not talking about them. Kids are always top priority and should be taken care of. I am talking about people around us. Love isn’t painful or stressful. Yeah it’s work but when you are trying to fix people who should be fixing themselves it’s draining. Never again will I put in more than I get in return. Ever. You shouldn’t either. 

For so long I had projects after projects come into my life. These people didn’t give back to me what I gave to them. At the time you settle. You figure well they love me or they enjoy my company so that’s something. NO it’s not. It’s not at all. If you are not 50-50 in any relationship then you need to make changes or get out. I will never allow myself to give more than what I get back. Not out of selfishness out of knowing I too deserved the love and respect I invested in others.

I reflect on to those who came into my life and I wipe the slate clean. All but one person I invested time

in gave me that time and ironically he’s still in my life. He’s an overall great guy and been there for a long time. All the others in between just felt draining. It’s not what love and dating and relationships are about at all. 

I hope if you’re married or in a relationship you reflect. I hope you are in a relationship that is balanced. With a mutual love and respect for eachother. Don’t cheat. Don’t lie. Don’t make empty promises. Don’t settle. Don’t talk bad about your significant others to people. If you don’t like something communicate with them. I mean how can you spend your life with someone you don’t know how to talk to. 

If you’re single I hope you learn to fully love yourself and set boundaries to what you will accept and will not.  

All this means is I have yet to find the one. When you do none of this happens. It’s balanced. It’s a team effort. I do hope you understand the true meaning of love isn’t pain. It’s teamwork and companionship. It’s trust and choosing that person every single day. 

What Are Your Goals?

Lately it’s been a question we bring up. Today we asked again. What’s your word of the year? Mine was growth. We talked about self acceptance. Peace. Love. Change. On and on. The best part is every year is something different. Focus on something YOU need to change or fix or embrace or add to your life. 

Set a goal-weekly monthly yearly etc... How are you going to better yourself? What’s your one word for this year? What goals would you set for yourself?

There’s A Difference In Looking At One Self

Silence Your Brain

I decided to not make any plans. I haven’t had a break in a while. I wanted to regroup. Meditate. Cleanse the past. Heal my heart. Rest my brain.  I wasn’t sad at all. Actually really happy. I am learning the process of being alone while enjoying it. Actually really fully enjoying it. I said no thanks to a lot of people over and over who asked to make plans to hang or grab breakfast or lunch or dinner not because I didn’t want to but because I needed this time. I needed to be alone. Take care of me. 

But then something changed. 

I woke up worked out ran errands. Was so happy. My friend called she asked what I was doing. I said running errands and then going to the mall. She said me too. I said really she said yeah. I said great let’s go together. 

Can I tell you that changed my whole day. 9 hours later and my day that was meant to be alone was filled was awesome chats and shopping and eating and eating some more and fun cocktails and belly laughs and hanging in three different cities while meeting up with my sister and her best friend and this dynamic foursome took on the day and I freaking loved every second of it. 

 I want you to know it’s so important to rest your brain and heal and love yourself and your time but spontaneous fun...that’s priceless.  That’s healing. That’s love. That’s something you thank the universe for. 

The fact that having no plans made me so happy actually caused me to go along with my day and it turned into a fun adventure with us four gals. 

Being happy alone doesn’t mean you have to be alone. Today actually was exactly what I needed!

West Hartford Restaurant Week

Practice These Steps

You Can Handle Anything

💗 let any pain go...

Heal & It Will Show

Be Present & Find Your Balance